The (B)Advent Calendar - Dec 2nd

Something that 90% of people will be able to relate to, I'm sure...

Picture the scene... you're either a little boy or girl child, or an adult male, opening your presents on Christmas morning... and you come to one that says "All my love & hope it fits, Granny" - and your heart sinks to your boots...

Cautiously, you peel back the paper... and there it is - a hand-knitted granny original jumper!

And you wear it (well, you have to, because Granny's coming for dinner, and she'll expect to see you loving your snazzy gansey) even though it's one or more of the following:

Scratchy
Too long/short on the body
Too long/short on the sleeves (but opposite of what's wrong with the body)
Too tight at the neck

And then you spend the rest of the year with it in the bottom of the drawer, deflecting Granny's enquiries of "Where's that jumper I gave you for Christmas?" with Excuse 106 from the handbook...

"I only wear it on really, really special occasions, because I don't want it to get damaged. I love it so much I'd just be heart-broken".

Bah, Humbug!