I RUDDY GIVE UP!

I've just spent a while creating a post with music vids for you, but my stupid computer's running really slow, and has crashed twice, so I give up trying to post it for tonight. It's too fucking cold to sit up here much longer, so I'm going to get under my blanket and try to ignore the fact that Monday is coming looming ahead on the near horizon. It's amazing how easily all that stress and depression has ploomped down on my shoulders again. I just need to think "I've only got one day before I'm back to work", and I want to cry.

I've had a really restful week... no visitors... only really saw my brother... just being a hermit with the cats. I've slept when I wanted to - even if that meant lying in til lunchtime and then napping again around teatime, and then being awake in the wee small hours of the morning.

I've watched crap telly... and just rested.

Tomorrow is going to be probably the most social I've been all week - I'm meeting a friend, and we're going to a local beach to release some balloons in memory of a friend of ours who died of cancer a couple of years ago. Her birthday would have been on Thursday 3rd January and, even though she didn't live here, and she hadn't been up for a year or so before she died, I miss her. Thursday wasn't a great day for me.

Oh, both New Year's Day Ba's went up as well - Bastards!

So, I think that's all my news - I'll say "Cheerio", go and fill a bottle, get under my blanket, watch "Casualty", hope and pray I've won the Lottery... and then cry a while for holidays gone all too quick...